Friday, September 19, 2008

Ezer Kenegdo & Related Poems

This is my first blog on blogspot- this is the blog I've decided to dedicate to my poetry and other creative endeavours. My work has been getting lost in my other very chatty blogs. The following are all poems written about Mr. Christopher McKenzie (TX) in some way or another- and I praise God that I am finally OVER him. As Leona Lewis' *The Best You Never Had* plays I smile knowing all that he could have had but lost... my heart, my body, my pure beauty is still intact and now we can be the best of friends.
Enjoy the poems as you look into my heart at a part of the journey my heart took on that love road. Keep Blessed and John 14:1-3
Princess Natasha
{I know that I am a Princess because my Father is the King Of Kings!}
Ezer Kenegdo
By: Natasha Tatania D. Rufin
September 10th,2008
I was his tall glass of water
Sustaining him whenever his soul was dry
But he left me in a drought
Wondering how and why
This body of mine still longs for the touch of his love
The way his words coursed its way down my body
Over the petals of the rose that has never be touched
He was my first love, the only true love I'd ever felt,
But he didn't or couldn't love me
Why could he not see me
See me as his ezer kenegdo
His helpmate, His sustainer,
I don't know
I guess I never will
But alas I have learned to let him go...
Do You Think I’m Beautiful?
By: Natasha Tatania D. Rufin
April 5th, 2008
I wanted- oh how I wanted you to fight for me
To love me, to hold me
Be my hero
Let me know and feel my beauty
As I felt captivated and captured in a way that I had never known.
Everytime I asked you how you felt
It was my way of asking:
Do you think I’m beautiful?
Am I worth fighting battles for?
Am I the one you want to share this adventure know as life with?
Am I the princess of your dreams
The lady who you love really and truly?
Yet you never replied...
I lay on my pillow
No longer wanting to laugh or smile
Hating so much that I loved you,
Hating so much that I now realized
That you were just another right person at a very wrong time
I cry as I realize that seriously I would love you forever!
This time as I hear love knocking on my door
I hesitate
Wondering if I should, could, or would be able to love again.
I hear a voice behind me, reminding me
That if no one else will
He finds me beautiful
I truly captivate his heart
He will fight for me
Will come for me
Will show me my real beauty!
Do you think I’m beautiful?
The answer is no longer all I need
My Daddy has His arms around me
His love and desire is all that I need!
Waiting...
By: Natasha Tatania D. Rufin
March 24th, 2008
The wind rustles through the trees around me
I stand on a hill looking out to sea
Waiting on something
Waiting on you
Waiting on us to really and fully begin
Waiting on the tide that will bring you in.
As I stand there
I hear the voices of others who try to steal my heart
I hear the voices of those who want to see us apart
They want to be the ones that break down the walls surrounding my heart
That melt the ice inside
And even though they have tried
I know that it was meant to be me and you
I know that without a doubt I love you
That the words I have for you are true
That God created me for you!
Finally you arrive
Coming to claim what is righfully yours
Coming to kiss my pain away
As finally I can feel your arms around me
But not without a fight
Battling the dragons of fear, doubt and despair from my mind
You are here to love me at the right time.
I am your Ezer Kenegdo
The one and only that God has for you
And as you show me what it feels like to be really and truly loved
I am happy and content knowing
That finally all of my hopes and dreams have come true!
Suddenly I awake from my dream
It felt so real
I thought that this time it was truly going to happen
You would be here with me forever,
But I awake to feel of your presence lingering
But as I look around I know that you could not have been here.
You wouldn’t have shown up here and left without a word or kiss
You wouldn’t have shown up here and not granted my every wish
You wouldn’t have shown here and left me the same
You would have come here and turned the ice in my heart to steam.
But until then I will continue to dream...
Para Siempre... For Always
By: Natasha Tatania D. Rufin
March 12th, 2008
Te quiero por una vez y para siempre
I love you for once and for always
I love you today, tomorrow and forever
I always have, I always will
You’re the one I want
If it’s in my Father’s will...
Sometimes I lay here wondering if it is?
Can I have you?
All of you?
The outside and the inside
The aspects of you that make me smile, that make me laugh, that make me frown,
That remind me when I’m letting the standards I have down.
I feel like melting when ever I think of you
I know that you will hold me in your arms
Keep me safe from harm
You see the beauty in me that is like a butterfly’s
Always on the run
Always ready to fly.
Until I met you-
You saw the beauty in me
Before I fully saw it
Made me believe that maybe just maybe
I could become more than the woman you saw in me
Love made me believe-
Believe in me and you
Even when I was still unsure of who I was when I looked in the mirror
Loving you made it all clearer.
Before anyone began to see the me I had hidden
There was you
Before I allowed others to get close
There was you
Before I became the young Princess that now stands beside you
There was you!
You were the first one
The only true one
The only real one
The only lover of my heart
The one that I pray will never tear me apart.
For once and always
For the good and the bad days
Until the day I die
The love I have for you won’t be a lie...
Para Siempre!
Nat’s Note: Those two words in Spanish always send shivers down my spine! They are so beautiful! I pray that you have enjoyed and that you keep smiling and remever that love is beautiful! Keep 1 John 4 in your Spirit.

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